How I became a Baha’i- part two

I decided to go to a Baha’i event in April 2018, to become more acquainted with the Faith itself. I had been interested in the Faith for some time, and I had done some reading about it, which impressed yet confounded me. I liked the message of unity and diversity, but it seemed crazy to implement such an idea. How could it be done when the religions themselves were divided into numerous sects, from Catholic to Methodist to Sunni to Shia to Ismaili to Theravada to Tibetan to Mahayana groups. The different groups were independent of each other, with different leadership structures and different aims based on their interpretation of holy Scriptures. Nvm then the task of viewing all the religions as true and correct, there had to been one faith, one spiritual tradition that was the source of divinity. It was my initial arrogance, then, that prevented me from seeing the full picture, the beauty the Baha’i Faith wanted to capture.
I saw the event on Meetup one Saturday afternoon, and I was fascinated by the subject of Is Humanity Reaching a Spiritual Tipping Point? I especially loved the picture of a globe, it really seemed to strike a chord with me and my feelings about the world. I had wasted 2017 in a near constant state of outrage and hopelessness, eternally angry at things Trump and other Republicans said and trying to vent my rage through social media and political outlets. Gradually, I lost my enthusiasm for this process and I shifted away from Democratic and progressive causes into Libertarian ones and other tech stuff. In particular, I wanted to help the world and bridge divides in my country, to move past the narrow partisan labels that have divided us for so many years. I began shifting towards libertarian socialism, with a focus on smaller companies, efficient and lean government and democratic devolution. Little did I know that the Faith was compatible with these ideals.
At the Meetup, the turnout was pretty good. There were 3 hosts of the event: Riaz, Linda, and Saba. There were people from a variety of backgrounds, including an Orthodox Jewish guy and a Reiki healer. People had perspectives to share on the spiritual tipping point, both optimistic and negative views. The optimistic views were reinforced by the Baha’i view of the forces of unity vs the forces of disunity. On the one hand, authoritarianism, nationalism, and ignorance caused people to congregate in ideological and national tribal identities, weakening their ties to people different from them. Yet on the other hand, the forces of unity would eventually win out and unite mankind. What intrigued me was the Baha’i concept of two kinds of peace: the Lesser Peace and the Most Great Peace. The Lesser Peace was something to be achieved using spiritual methods to foster a sense of unity and community among mankind. I was intrigued, so I gave the Baha’is my contact info and met with Riaz later at Starbucks.
At Starbucks, I got an exposure to the Baha’i Faith that astonished me. One was that there were two Prophets(the Bab and Baha’ull’ah). Another was the importance of gender and racial equality. Yet another was the need for a global language to be the global lingua franca. And finally, the idea of the unity of all religions and that all the Manifestations prophesied about the coming of one who would help unite the world. Baha’ull’ah was the one they supposedly talked about, which astonished me. I wanted to investigate the history of the Faith and its personas, so I knew it wasn’t some crazy cult. To my surprise, Riaz readily assented and gave me a couple books to read.
I began reading the books, and I embarked on a trip to Chicago in May. Riaz and Linda told me to visit the House of Worship in Chicago, one of 10 in the world. I then related how I visited the Lotus Temple as a child, and I know felt a desire to go to a Fireside at this House. I went on a Friday night, entering a Fireside consisting of 10 people. They discussed some basics of the Faith, including their stories of becoming Baha’i and dealing with Covenant breakers. I had learned of the Guardian’s excommunication of his whole family from the Faith, and I inquired further about it. I also brought up the issue of Mason Remey, and I asked why there hadn’t been a second Guardian. They said simply that the Faith had reached the point where a Universal House of Justice could be elected and that it alone was sufficient to hold executive power. They also said Mason Remey had earlier signed a declaration that there could be no successor to Shoghi Effendi, and that he was 86 when he tried to usurp power. The greed of such a high-ranking member in the Faith resonated with me, and made me realize how humble the Baha’is were. I also understood that the relatives of Shoghi Effendi began associating with Covenant breakers and disobeying the Guardian repeatedly, forcing him to painfully break ties with them. Indeed one of them said that perhaps this contributed to the Guardian’s death at the age of 60, after enduring many stresses and trials in life.
I went back with a renewed zeal for the Faith, and I began questioning Buddhist and Christian doctrines that I had explored. I concluded that Buddhist ideas about reincarnation and the unimportance of a Creator were flawed. How could the universe be infinite when such a chain of cause and effect would lead to an infinite cycle that at some point would need to be stopped. And I felt that Buddhism was generally theistic; most Buddhists venerated ancestors, local and national deities, and even the Buddha himself. Hence the numerous idols and depictions of a sitting, calm Buddha. The idea of reincarnation also did not make sense to me, as Buddhists generally deny the idea of atman, a distinct soul. But then what gets reborn if there is no individual soul; the Buddhists generally give an answer of vague mental particles and states influenced by the karma of the person upon death. Even if this collection does survive, the consciousness and identity do not survive in the next life, hence the person is effectively starting over in a new life and identity. And the fact is that this collection of mental particles/experiences/thoughts was permanent in that it would keep on going through the rebirth process until a person reached nirvana. So I began to move away from Buddhism.
With Christianity, the process was more intense. My Christian identity was stronger, and I felt a closer tie to my Christian church in Atlanta than the Buddhist places I frequented. Coincidentally, the church is an evangelical one, and they were eager to see me join and be saved from eternal damnation. But this got to my frustration with standard Christianity, the idea that Jesus was the Supreme incarnation of God and that there was eternal damnation without his grace. I had intense debates with my Christian friends(which I now regret as something that was rash and hasty) over these issues. I brought up the issue of those who never heard of Jesus and the victims of the Holocaust, feeling it would be unfair for God to just throw them in Hell for not believing the right thing. They felt I misunderstood the Gospel, that I needed to understand that all humans were sinful and bound for Hell without the forgiveness Jesus’s sacrifice gave. I countered with the example of Zoroaster and the Great Peacemaker(the prophet who united the Iroquois and brought an end to tribal warfare and cannibalism), prophets who seemed pure and sinless. I also began to question the supremacy of Jesus, especially given that Islam arose 6 centuries after Christ and conquered and converted many Christians. Yet it seemed that Islam was no better or worse in its atrocities than the Christians had been; the Muslims had historically treated the Jews far better than the European Christians did. I also noticed that the Christians had virtually exterminated paganism in Europe, except for the Sami tribe in Scandinavia. The debates drove me to study the Baha’i Faith deeper and deeper, and I concluded that Jesus was not literally God or divine, but rather another Prophet like Muhammad, the Buddha, and Baha’ull’ah.
Eventually in July, I went on a cruise and enjoyed many material delights. I also split an unlimited drink plan with my brother, and I spent much of the cruise rather inebriated. In this state, I felt a strong sense of discontent and anger; I felt the need to grow closer to God and develop spiritual qualities. I needed to embrace God now and develop myself for eternal life, rather than cling to temporary material desires and items. In this state of drunkenness, I resolved to become a Baha’i and become sober.
I came back and arranged to meet Riaz and Linda at their home. I watched a Widening Embrace with them and felt happiness and joy at seeing the diversity of the Faith. I marveled at Baha’i service throughout the world, at Baha’i attainments and activity buzzing throughout the world. I knew this was it, the Faith and Cause that would unite the world through sheer power and harnessing of the human spirit and human creativity. I knew it was now time to commit, to take the plunge into the Faith. So I asked to borrow their laptop so I could register, and they provided it to me. After formally enrolling, I asked what was next, a baptism in water? They chuckled and said I could speak more with the National Assembly about the Faith, which I did. And then I attended my first Ruhi Book 2 study with Riaz and his granddaughters. I saw a new style of education, one that was wholly spiritual and collaborative. Instead of Riaz telling his students what to think and how to interpret Baha’i scripture, I found that he encouraged his nervous granddaughters to think for themselves, to develop a personal understanding and love of the message of Baha’ull’ah. This touched me, and I knew I had found a new approach to religion and spirituality perhaps unmatched in all the world.